Hi! I’m Chrys, creator of Parenting Refocused. I live in Alberta, Canada with my husband and our 13 and 11 year old daughters, but I’m originally from Arkansas (and yes, it does get way too cold up here! but we love it). I love to sing, read, and write. And drink coffee.
Why Parenting Refocused?
Like many, I’ve struggled with how to get kids to listen without yelling, and how to stay connected without being a pushover. I used to think I was so patient until I became a parent!
We all love our kids, but raising them is so challenging- and there’s immense pressure to get it “right”. We don’t want our children growing up spoiled or hurting anyone. We want them to stay safe.
Often the focus is on managing each challenging behaviour- finding just the right punishment or reward to get the desired results. But when we do this, we miss seeing the bigger picture.
If we take a step back and refocus, we can see the whole child: their strengths and challenges, the needs they’re trying to meet through their behaviours, and how our responses affect theirs.
I’ve started this site to explore and adjust the way we look at children and their behaviours. I also offer tools and support in making this shift. We’ll work with our children toward developing respectful connected relationships, self-discipline, and mindfulness. I hope you’ll join us!
My Background
I get to work with children every day as an educational assistant in a local elementary school. It definitely gives me a lot of extra practice! Prior to this I was a registered nurse in mental health for six years.
I’ve also been a Certified Positive Discipline Parent Educator since 2014 and I do much of my parent support within this framework. Learning about Positive Discipline helped us so much when our girls were younger that I started sharing what I learned with others- and found it was helping them too. One of the main parts I often reference is the need for being both kind and firm. We all need connection but we also need boundaries.
I’m a big advocate for mindfulness as well, which I’d learned about first as a nursing student, and then in my work in mental health. To further my practice I took the Mindful Educator Essentials course from Mindful Schools, a nonprofit organization that provides training and curriculum for teaching mindfulness in schools. Taking even a few minutes a day to sit mindfully can provide huge benefits. When we set clear intentions and focus on being present, we’re better able to handle any of the stressors that come our way- including those from our children.
