Have your kids gone away at all this summer?
We just spent the weekend reconnecting with our girls after their week away visiting family. First there was the inevitable emotional and exhausted period- complete with all their stuff haphazardly unloaded back into our (previously clean) house, wanting to sit right on us, wanting nothing to do with us, excitedly telling us everything they did, crying about things that were hard.. and that was just the first two hours.
But we’d mentally prepared ourselves for things to be crazy, so we took some deep breaths, gave each other knowing and encouraging looks, and did our best to embrace the chaos until bedtime.
Thankfully, we just barely made it.
There were a few more bumpy parts over the weekend (mostly with the youngest, who was extra tired) but lots of good in between. And since you tend to get more of what you focus on, we went for the good.
..because we really didn’t feel like focusing on the youngest dying over what we had for supper, or the oldest proclaiming that it wasn’t fair her sister got to play in Ikea *and* have ice cream last week and she only got to have ice cream.
So those things received the attention they were due (validation and empathy) and we got back to acknowledging the good stuff- which mostly led to more good stuff. No day can be perfect. Aiming for “good enough” is much healthier. And attainable.
Our weekend was definitely good enough. Some parts were even great, and we may not have noticed that if we were still stuck being upset about the bad parts.
Transitioning back home from camps and trips can be difficult for all of us, but it can be easier if we do something fun to reconnect, focus on the good, lower expectations, and breathe. We also need to remember to take care of ourselves, because we can’t pour from empty cups.
Do you have any special ways you like to reconnect after time away from your kids?
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